The Spilt Tea newspaper: every report, what it is worth, and what changes it

There are 13 reports you can get (two more sit in the game files but can never appear). Each one plays at the front desk, after the last card of a big event is handed in, whether that dress passed or failed. 10 of them change with the dresses you made, 12 unlock an achievement, and together they give 39.5 prestige, more than 200 finished dresses add up to (shop rank).

Can you read it again?

No. When you close a report the game marks it as read and saves, and a read report never plays again. (If the game is shut while a report is still open, it has not been marked yet.) There is no archive or menu for old issues; you can only turn between its two pages while it is open. Take your time before you press continue.

Achievements that wait for the paper

Steam describes these as finishing an event’s dresses, but the game unlocks each one when you have read that event’s report. If you handed in the last dress and nothing popped, go back to the front desk: the paper comes after the client’s debrief. The rest of the list is on missable achievements.

Every report, in story order

Where a report reacts to your work, it looks at dresses from the same event. A pass and a top-marks pass read the same; a failed dress gets the unkind version. When it names a colour, it counts the dress’s pieces, each piece shared equally among its fabric’s colours, and picks the colour with the most; when it names a fabric, it is the kind of fabric with the most area.

1. After Respectful Funeral Marie+3 prestige
   • Flamboyant Funeral (Prudence): its main colour
   • Fierce Funeral (Priya): whether it passed
   • Respectful Funeral (Marie): whether it passed

   Unlocks Laid To Dress

2. After Spirited Exercise Alice+3 prestige
   • Spirited Exercise (Alice): its main colour, its main fabric and whether it passed

   Unlocks Style Goals

3. After Art Appreciator Vivian+2.5 prestige
   • Exhibition Opening (Priya): its main colour and its main fabric
   • Secret Art Critic (Adora): whether it passed
   • Art Appreciator (Vivian): whether it passed

   Unlocks Dart Deco

4. After Carrot Promotion Edith+3 prestige
   • Carrot Promotion (Edith): its main colour and whether it passed

   Unlocks Rooting For You

5. After A-maze-ingly Lost Fiona+2.5 prestige
   • Love Labyrinth (Alice): whether it passed
   • A-maze-ingly Lost (Fiona): whether it passed

   Unlocks Hedge Your Bets

6. After Spring Fete Marie+3 prestige
   • Floral Romance (Prudence): its main colour and whether it passed

   Unlocks Don't Wanna Miss A Spring

7. After Beloved Ox Fiona+2.5 prestige
   • Beloved Ox (Fiona): its main colour and whether it passed
   • Precious Pigeon (Dorothy): whether it passed

   Unlocks Simply Beastly

8. After Never the Bride Prudence+3.5 prestige
   • Marie's Wedding (Marie): its main colour
   • Maid of Honour (Priya): whether it passed

   Unlocks Newlythreads

9. After Constellation Inspiration Priya+2 prestige
   • Moonlight Wanderer (Adora): whether it passed
10. After Bold Tigress Rose+4.5 prestige

    The same whatever you made.

    Unlocks Extrav-organza

11. After Another Encore Edith+3 prestige
    • Another Encore (Edith): its main colour
    • Opera Night (Fiona): whether it passed
    • Gala Supporter (Dorothy): whether it passed

    Unlocks On a High Note

12. After Dark Emissary Vivian+4.5 prestige

    The same whatever you made.

    Unlocks Crowning Glory

13. After Painted Dream Prudence+2.5 prestige

    The same whatever you made.

    Unlocks Don We Now Our Gay Apparel

The paper itself, the town it reports on and the people it gossips about are on Twillford. The events in order are on the walkthrough.